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Not the one

I am not the Karen Hawkins you’re looking for

Hello,

Thank you so much for writing! I have good news and bad news.

The good news is that you’ve reached Karen Hawkins. The bad news is that I’m not the Karen Hawkins you’re looking for.

You see:

I don’t write romance novels.

I don’t live in North Carolina, London, Arkansas, or Arizona.

I’m not buying or selling a home in any of those places.

I don’t teach.

I don’t coach.

I don’t have school-age children.

My non-existent school-age children, thankfully, don’t require frequent trips to the principal’s office and subsequent summons for me.

I don’t attend your church, and I won’t be choosing this Sunday’s hymns or assembling the bulletin.

I didn’t set up that costume jewelry shop account.

And while I’m sure I’d love to see Matilda the Musical in California, I won’t be able to use the tickets you emailed. 

Thank you for updating your address book accordingly.

Fist bump,
Black Karen Hawkins

Photo by Gemma Evans on Unsplash